President Obama gave the OK today for military involvement in the war on squirrels that are stealing my bonsai trees. Reliable ground sources confirm that the fuzzy-little-rats have been sneaking in at night, cloaked by darkness, and have been stealing my cute, little trees. The clever rodent bastards have been making it appear that the thefts were the work of Al-Qaeda. Said President Obama, "Their reign of terror MUST end! I will see to it that no tree is left unprotected." - AP News
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